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Irwin D. Trenton, the mighty Formula 1 journalist with a silver beard as wild as the circuits he covered for the now defunct Turbo Tribune magazine, set off from Barcelona in his state-of-the-art kayak, a marvel of Martian carbon fiber and unobtanium that gleamed under the Mediterranean sun. The vessel, dubbed The Scoop, was a self-sustaining beast with a mini cooking stove sizzling with freeze-dried paella and a porta-loo that hummed with space-grade efficiency. As he paddled past the Balearic Islands, a pod of dolphins mistook him for a sea god and escorted him for miles, only to abandon him when a rogue wave flipped The Scoop. Irwin wrestled a curious octopus for his paddle, bartered with a passing fisherman for fresh sardines, and sweet-talked a Spanish coastguard drone into not reporting his questionable route. By the time he hit the open Atlantic, he’d already survived a lightning storm that singed his notebook and a near-collision with a container ship hauling counterfeit F1 merch.
The Atlantic was a beast of its own, throwing tantrums that tested Irwin’s resolve and The Scoop’s indestructibility. Off the Azores, he was adopted by a flock of migratory seabirds who nested in his beard, mistaking it for a floating island. A pirate skiff—yes, actual pirates—tried to board him near the Canary Islands, but Irwin, ever the negotiator, traded a half-eaten protein bar and a story about Ayrton Senna’s 1991 Monaco win for safe passage. He navigated by the stars, his GPS fritzing after a whale playfully nudged the kayak, sending his satellite phone to a watery grave. The stove kept him fed with questionable seaweed soups, but the sea water he accidentally gulped during a squall began to take its toll, his throat raw as sandpaper. Yet, Irwin pressed on, fueled by the thought of driver media day in Canada, his kayak slicing through waves like a Red Bull car through Turn 1 of the 4.361-km Circuit Gilles-Villeneuve in Montreal.
By some miracle, Irwin beached The Scoop in Montreal on Wednesday night, just in time for Thursday’s media duties at the Canadian Grand Prix. He staggered into the paddock, sunburnt, salt-crusted, and voiceless from the gallons of sea water he’d inadvertently chugged. His throat, now a gravelly ruin, required a voice modulator device that made him sound like Darth Vader’s chain-smoking cousin. “Max, your tire strategy,” he rasped at Verstappen, the device crackling ominously, “was it bold or reckless?” The drivers, half-amused, half-terrified, answered his questions with unusual candor, perhaps fearing the wrath of this kayak-conquering, Vader-voiced legend. Irwin’s adventure became the talk of the paddock, his Martian kayak parked outside the media center as a testament to his lunacy. He filed his story (coming to Iberianmph soon) —titled “From Barcelona to Bottas: A Journalist’s Odyssey”—with a grin, knowing he’d outdone every deadline and doubter, even if his voice now belonged to a galaxy far, far away.
PREVIEW
The 2025 Canadian Grand Prix, officially the Formula 1 Pirelli Grand Prix du Canada, is set to electrify Montreal on June 13-15 at the iconic 4.361-kilometer Circuit Gilles-Villeneuve, marking its 44th hosting as an F1 World Championship event. The weekend kicks off with two practice sessions on Friday at 1:30 PM and 5:00 PM local time, followed by a third practice and qualifying on Saturday at 12:30 PM and 4:00 PM, respectively. The 70-lap race starts Sunday at 2:00 PM, promising high drama on a track known for its stop-start nature, heavy-braking chicanes, and the infamous Wall of Champions, which has claimed champions like Michael Schumacher and Jacques Villeneuve. With sunny weather forecast (20-23°C, slight chance of showers on race day), expect a fast, tactical race where tire strategy—using Pirelli’s softest C4, C5, and C6 compounds—will be critical.
The Circuit Gilles-Villeneuve, located on Notre Dame Island in the St. Lawrence River, is a fan and driver favorite for its unique blend of tight corners like the Senna ‘S’ and Turn 10’s hairpin, paired with flowing, high-speed straights that reward bold overtaking. Historically, the track has delivered unpredictable races—2024 saw Max Verstappen triumph in wet conditions, while Ferrari suffered a double DNF. Lewis Hamilton and Schumacher hold the record with seven wins each, and Ferrari leads constructors with 14 victories, though McLaren’s current form (362 points in the Constructors’ Championship) makes them favorites. The event’s vibrant atmosphere, with Montreal turning into an F1 party hub, draws huge crowds, and grandstands like 15, 21, and 24 around the hairpin offer prime viewing.
Expect intense competition, with McLaren’s Oscar Piastri (186 points) and Lando Norris (176 points) leading the Drivers’ Championship, while Verstappen (137 points) chases a fourth consecutive Canadian win but risks a one-race ban after accruing penalty points in Spain. The FIA’s new front-wing flexibility rules, tightened post-Spain, could shake up performance, potentially affecting McLaren’s edge and boosting Ferrari or Mercedes, with rookie Kimi Antonelli tipped to shine. Off-track, the event’s logistics have drawn scrutiny after 2024’s “mess,” prompting organizers to streamline operations, with social media buzzing about potential groundhog sightings and Montreal’s festive vibe. Tickets for grandstands or VIP suites are selling fast, with practice and qualifying sessions offering a less crowded way to enjoy the action.
Now, I live in a neighbourhood filled with Brazilian immigrants who are all crazy-mad fans of Felipe Drugovich, believe it or not. Poor Gabriel Bortoleto! Apparently, he’s not so popular in his native Brazil. I mean, what can sound more Brazilian than Felipe’s “Drugovich” surname. Tell me all about it. Anyhoo, my pão de queijo loving friends, here’s one for you!
The odds of Felipe Drugovich replacing Lance Stroll at the 2025 Canadian Grand Prix hinge on Stroll’s recovery from a wrist injury sustained in a 2023 cycling accident, which forced him to withdraw from the Spanish Grand Prix after qualifying. Recent reports indicate Stroll underwent surgery, and while Aston Martin’s “Plan A” is for him to race in Montreal, his fitness remains uncertain, with a final decision expected close to the event. Drugovich, Aston Martin’s reserve driver and 2022 Formula 2 champion, is the leading candidate to step in, having prioritized F1 over his Le Mans 24 Hours commitment with Cadillac, which clashes with the Canadian GP weekend. However, some sources suggest Drugovich is now “totally focused on Le Mans,” potentially reducing his availability unless Aston Martin explicitly pulls him. Given Stroll’s determination to race at his home Grand Prix and recent updates leaning toward his return, the likelihood of Drugovich replacing him appears low—perhaps a 20-30% chance—pending medical clearance.
If Stroll is ruled unfit, Drugovich’s familiarity with Aston Martin’s car, from FP1 sessions and simulator work, makes him the logical choice over other reserves like Stoffel Vandoorne, who is also committed to Le Mans with Peugeot, or Mercedes’ Valtteri Bottas, who carries a five-place grid penalty. Aston Martin’s chief trackside officer, Mike Krack, has emphasized flexibility, stating the team can reassign Le Mans-bound drivers if needed, but the tight timeline and Stroll’s history of defying recovery odds (racing in Bahrain 2023 just weeks after the initial injury) tilt the scales toward Stroll competing. Paddock sentiment in the media center reflects intrigue, with some speculating Stroll pushed through Spain’s qualifying to block Drugovich, fearing a strong performance. Ultimately, unless Stroll’s condition deteriorates significantly, Drugovich’s F1 debut in Canada remains a backup plan, with the team prioritizing their regular driver’s homecoming.
REVIEW (COMING ON MONDAY)
And the winner was…
The 2025 Canadian Grand Prix at Circuit Gilles-Villeneuve delivered a dramatic race, with George Russell securing Mercedes’ first victory of the season from pole position. Russell maintained his lead throughout the 70-lap race, fending off Max Verstappen, who finished second for Red Bull. A late collision between McLaren teammates Oscar Piastri and Lando Norris triggered a safety car finish, with Norris crashing out after misjudging a move, earning a five-second penalty. Kimi Antonelli, at just 18, claimed his maiden F1 podium in third, marking a double podium for Mercedes and becoming the third-youngest podium finisher in F1 history.
The race highlighted strategic battles and controversies. Most frontrunners, including Russell and Verstappen, opted for two-stop strategies, while others like Carlos Sainz executed a long one-stop to salvage 10th for Williams. Red Bull’s post-race protest against Russell for alleged erratic driving behind the safety car was rejected, securing his win. Several drivers, including Antonelli, Piastri, and Charles Leclerc, received warnings for passing on the cool-down lap under safety car conditions. Lewis Hamilton, hampered by early floor damage from striking a groundhog, finished sixth for Ferrari, while Piastri’s fourth place extended his championship lead by 22 points over Norris.
McLaren’s intra-team clash stole headlines, overshadowing Mercedes’ dominance. Norris’ collision with Piastri, who was battling Antonelli for third, cost McLaren a potential podium and raised questions about Norris’ racecraft amid his championship fight. Ferrari’s strategy frustrated Leclerc, who led briefly but finished fifth after a late pit stop. Alonso and Hulkenberg scored solid points in seventh and eighth for Aston Martin and Sauber, respectively, while Williams’ Alex Albon retired due to a power unit issue. The race underscored Mercedes’ resurgence, McLaren’s tensions, and Antonelli’s emergence as a future star.
You’ll probably think that I’m pulling your leg, however I have a lot of American neighbours as well, all living happily in Lisbon. They’ve been absolutely driving me crazy with all these questions about HAAS and Cadillac and Plymouth Roadrunner… I mean. This guy Bill always be like, “How does HAAS F1 Team, which celebrated its 200th Formula 1 race in Montreal, stack up against other American Formula 1 teams of the past? Will Gene Haas finally sell off his operation and cash in on his investment now that Cadillac is about to join the grid?” Bill, I know you’re reading this bud, have at it.
Haas F1, marking its 200th race at the 2025 Canadian Grand Prix, is the most successful American-led team since Penske’s brief stint in the 1970s. Unlike predecessors like Haas Lola (1985-86), which scored no points, or the failed US F1 project (2010), Haas has 299 points across nine seasons, with a best of fifth in the 2018 Constructors’ Championship. Its Ferrari-powered model and partnerships with Dallara and Toyota have sustained midfield competitiveness. No other American team, including Shadow or Parnelli, has matched Haas’ longevity or points haul.
Gene Haas’ potential sale remains speculative despite Cadillac’s 2026 grid entry. Haas’ lean operation, with 300-plus staff and a profitable 2025 outlook, contrasts with Cadillac’s GM-backed, 600-strong ambition to be a “true” American team. While Cadillac’s arrival could split sponsorships—Haas boasts 19 partners, 10 American—experts suggest both teams could benefit from rising U.S. F1 interest. Gene Haas has expressed frustration with consistent 10th-place finishes under f-bombing former Team Boss Guenther Steiner but shows no clear intent to sell, focusing instead on midfield growth.
Cadillac’s debut, with Ferrari engines and a U.S.-focused identity, poses a commercial challenge but not an existential threat to Haas. Haas’ established brand, technical ties with Ferrari and Toyota, and recent P7 championship finish under Ayao Komatsu provide stability. Media center sentiment in the F1 paddock reflects skepticism about Haas’ “American” identity, but its global approach and consistent points-scoring (28 in 2025 so far) suggest resilience. A sale to Andretti/GM was floated in 2024, but Haas’ current trajectory indicates Gene prefers to compete rather than cash out.
So there you have it, Bill. HAAS are no F1 haas-beens. What a cool joke. I’m the best there is.
iberianmph.com 